I learned in my process group that "escape" and "avoidance" are two of the most significant ways that trauma can manifest, so I've been diligently observing my responses for signs that I might be avoiding or trying to escape uncomfortable and undesirable situations or circumstance. It's shocking (to me) just how much I actually do so. I'm also amazed by the invisible "emotional field" of my orphaned exile that sits in wait for these opportunities of potential liberation from the exiled life.
It's one thing to know "intellectually" that humans beings experience life within the context of an emotional field, but it's quite something different to observe that emotional field when it's in motion and affecting my responses to what's happening around me. So I am getting all kinds of practice on observing this process without needing to act on the immediate reactions, although I don't like the fact that there is so much practice to be had. . . .
