A few weeks ago, when I attempted to move what I have in storage in Valle into storage in Prescott, I felt suffocated to open up the storage door. What do I need with all of that stuff?! Most of it has been in storage for more than a year, and I couldn't even tell you what's in the boxes, so I've obviously not needed any of it, but there it is. Good grief. . . .when I started out in life, I could fit everything I owned into the back seat of my tiny little Fiat. And now? I'm overwhelmed just to open a door!
When I was searching online for images for this blog, I found a lot of images of Jesus carrying his cross, and it made me feel tiny and petty for feeling so overwhelmed by all of this trivial and meaningless stuff. And it reminded my heart that I hold on to trivial and meaningless stuff on the level of spirit, too. And it's all of this "stuff" that keeps me burdened in my walk with God, as well. I carry everything. . . .don't let go of the things I should.
I feel the burden of this deeply in my body, today. . . .heavy and thick with just how overwhelmed it feels to carry around the weight of all of this stuff. And I'm no longer talking about the physical stuff. . . .I mean the trivial and meaningless stuff that suffocates me and makes my spirit feel like a soggy wet dog. I don't want to carry this burden any more, but I just don't know how to let it go.
The only saving grace for me today is that I know that this is not what God ever intended for me. So I continue to sort and purge. . . .through both the physical and the spiritual. . . .and pray for the courage to let go of these trivial and meaningless burdens that keep me separated from God.