Ace of Spades

Week 1, card 1; the Ace of Spades. I decided to just work through a suit at a time, rathet than trying to decide symbolic meaning for each. But the funny thing about this card is that when I engraved the card with the it's meaning, it wasn't until many hours later that I realized that the word I had intended to engrave on the card wasn't the word that got engraved.

I intended to engrave "Choice," but the word "Change" was engraved, instead.

At first I was upset, because it felt like the cards were already "ruined." But as I processed the unintended engraving faux pas, it forced me to process the relationship between change and happiness in my life.

Change is such a loaded word, but this card is really all about the Serenity prayer...Grant me the Serenity (one of the many faces of Happiness)...to accept the things I cannot CHANGE...the courage to CHANGE the things I can...and the wisdom to know the difference. It's all about change! And the obstacles that I can't accept absolutely create a block to experiencing Happiness.

Change happens.

Change is choice...but it's also very much about the parts of our lives that get changed whether we choose them, or not. But the degree to which I fight the change I can't control absolutely affects my ability to experience true happiness in my daily life...and there is much I can't accept.

I know it's sappy to have this card be all about the completely over used cliché Serenity Prayer, but it works...and it's the perfect first card in my Happiness Deck.

But the hardest part about this card is accepting what I cannot change when an important relationship is involved. I remember another quippy cliché that said something like, "If you don't like something change it...if you can't change it, leave it...and if you can't leave it, accept it." I've never figured out what to do if something is unacceptable...I guess that's what this process is all about with this deck of Happiness Cards...to answer the question of how to live a meaningful life in spite of the unacceptable thorns that embed themselves too deeply within our soul to remove them on our own.

So...Change it is...whether that change happens by intentional choice, invisibly beneath the surface, or by circumstances we may not ever choose or be able to control.

Serenity, Now!!

Well, if I want the Serenity, I guess I have to do the courage and acceptance parts, too...who knew that Happiness was so much work!

Playing The Cards I've Been Dealt

I turned 52 last week, which officially makes this my "deck of cards" birthday. So I bought a deck of cards as a process tool for this coming year...52 cards...52 weeks. It's a lovely deck of cards, with an M medallion, symbolic of my last name, and I am very excited about what this next year holds for me.

So what am I going to process?

I've been thinking about the four basic emotions: Mad, Sad, Glad, and Fear. Every single other emotion can be classed into one of these four categories. But the interesting part of this fact is how there are three basic "negative" emotional states, but there's only one "positive" emotional state.

There's only one positive emotional state!

There are many ways for this fact to be considered, but I believe that happiness is the core emotional state that we are born to experience. Stating this in a different way, in the absence of fear, anger, and sadness, the emotion that exists is happiness in one form or another. I believe that we are created with happiness as the primary emotional state that drives our entire life journey.

But, if we are inherently happiness-driven beings, why are there so many unhappy people?

I don't know the answer to this question, but there is a metaphor that people use to explain their unhappy lives, the metaphor of the crappy hand that they've been dealt, as if the cards themselves are crappy, which means that they must learn how to play their hand with the crappy cards they've been dealt.

What if crappy cards don't really exist?

I'm not defining how anyone else plays their life cards, but I no longer believe in crappy cards OR crappy hands. I believe that we are created inherently and essentially with a full deck of 52 happiness cards, and it's up to each person to decide for themselves how their happiness cards are defined and created.

But what about them pesky jokers?

Yep, the jokers are the problem...lol. There are two of them, and every problem in life is created by one of the two jokers...lol. I call my jokers "Nature" and "Nurture." Every obstacle in my life has been created by one of these two tricksters...lol...and they sure can create a lot of chaos.

I'm done playing with the Jokers.

I no longer want to focus on the Jokers that create roadblocks to playing with and enjoying my deck of Happiness cards. This year is going to be all about the discovery of how my 52 happiness cards are defined...by me...and I don't care what the Jokers think about all of this...lol.

This year is going to be all about the Happiness.

52 cards...52 weeks...52 positive emotional states of happiness that even the Jokers can't destroy.

I think I'm going to very much enjoy playing with this deck of cards...deal me in!