Two visits to the ER and hours of research on kidney stones have led me to the realization that this heinously painful stone is the karma of the "lifestyle choices" that I have become. I am not some hapless victim of this stone; I am its creator, its dark master, and the wielder of its fate.
I find it more than a bit interesting that my last blog entry was about feeling surrounded by battle with no place for comfort. And from the vantage point of two years worth of hindsight, I see clearly how I have turned to "ingestibles" for the "comfort" I don't find in my world. (I can't call it "food," because processed, fat and sugar-infested "crap" hardly qualifies as food.)
This kidney stone is the manifestation of everything that is painful and not working in the relationship with my self. And the "hard place" is, of course, what to do with that invisible, intangible, yet inescapable feeling of being surrounded by battle with no place for comfort...knowing that I can no longer "ingest" the comfort that I seek.